A Family At Play (view this story)

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Rep: 21
Chuck Fadely April 29, 2010, 9:57 p.m. permalink

Wow, great job!! Delightful story-telling; great audio; good moments; terrific visuals. Not much to criticize here!

I really resented the packaging, though. It would have been so much better as one continuous piece. And too much type!

I have a couple of very minor suggestions:
I don't often think that a narrator helps, but a few lines of Charles Kuralt or Bob Dotson-style lyrical scene-setting narrative could have helped some parts where it took a while to get to the point - i.e., the act 2 part about working with one's own kids. There were good sound bites in there but it took a little too much exposition to get to them.

And of course, I would have loved to see the curtain call and audience applause at the end of a show.... but I know how those things go sometimes.

Rep: 444
Eric Seals May 3, 2010, 7:35 p.m. permalink

What worked? about everything
What didn't work? almost nothing

I loved the way it was packaged on the website with that black background with the three acts, only wish it could have been extended out to the very edge of the page so no white was showing. I would have tried to chop in half the words in white type and played up each image a bit bigger.

You spent a lot of time on it and it shows, shot and edited well. Nice work with the Canon 5D and in that theater, behind the scenes and on stage the colors really pop. It can be hard to do video with that camera (at least to me) and you made it look easy.

Rep: 48
Pat Shannahan May 9, 2010, 2:03 p.m. permalink

Nice job. I think breaking it up into chapters was effective. I like the layered sound. What did you use to gather the sound.
Pat

Rep: 20
Submitter
Will Yurman May 9, 2010, 6:31 p.m. permalink

Thanks Pat and Chuck and Eric - It was a lot of fun to shoot - glad you guys liked it.

Pat, almost all of the audio was recorded on a Marantz PMD660 - a very small amount was just the on board audio from the camera.

Chuck, I was torn about breaking it into chapters - I thought it might be less intimadating to have multiple shorter pieces and it made it easier to organize in my head.

You're totally right that having Charles Kuralt or Bob Dotson or Ira Glass's voice as a narrator would have helped. But since all I had was my voice and my delivery I decided to leave it out :).

But seriously, as much as I like good narration and understand its value, I struggle with my own limited ability in that area. I loved the voices in this piece for example and worried my own amateurish narration would have stopped the story in its tracks rather than advance it.

Something I'm still trying to figure out.

thanks again,
will

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