Fire spinning show turns up the heat in Patchogue (view this story)

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Rep: 87
Michael Fagans Oct. 1, 2012, 10:05 p.m. permalink

Jessica:

Our apologies for being VERY late in reviewing this.

The good news is that you have a solid piece because you picked an interesting subject. Who doesn't want to watch all of this to see where it goes?

Some thoughts.....imagine if you had started out with Lisa saying 'Don't try this at home' and then going to your opening sequence. I really like the way you start, it has nice pacing and good variety, but I am just trying to imagine how to grab people's attention, even beyond the flames.

I was so glad to see an audience reaction shot. I would have been tempted to move it further forward, but that was something you needed and delivered. Kudos. That being said, I really would have liked an audience member to give us a 10 sec sound bite to convey some of the energy that seemed to exist at the event or there reaction post event to what they had witnessed.

At the end of the day, while I am glad that you or your subjects focused on safety, I really wanted to know why. Why would a person do this? Why? What makes them tick? While the safety stuff is solid reportage, as a journalist, I am intrigued about why people do certain activities.

The piece also felt a but interview heavy to me. I could have done with more or longer breaks between clips just the sound and visuals were captivating. That being said, I thought your split edits were well executed and I am glad that you kept the nat sound underneath the interviews. Also kudos for nice clean lighting and solid framing on your interviews, that really helped the piece.

Technically, I wish you had used sticks more (or better) just because there was a lot of movement at times. I am sure there were technical issues that made shooting this piece difficult, but this is more of an observation for the future.

So, overall, a solid submission to Finding the Frame. Thank you for sharing I look forward to seeing your next piece.

Rep: 141
Colin Mulvany Oct. 1, 2012, 11:14 p.m. permalink

I agree with everything Michael said. A couple of thing s to add:

Your opening is jarring. Fade up from black at the same time as fading up your audio. Pull me into your video; don't hit me with a brick.

When the fire artist says: "Don't try this at home..." you should hear her before you see her (a split edit.) Again, it is a jarring edit. 

Love the edit where the music beat hits right on when the artist blow a burst of flame. That's a magic edit!

More tight shots! There is a lot of repetitive movement that just cries out for sequencing. Shot a wide shot then zoom in and shoot a medium shot, then move in for a tight shot. Now you can edit all three into a cool sequence. There is a lot of fast-paced movement in this video, but the edit seems too slow. Better sequencing of video clips would help.

Shot the action, but don't forget to shoot the reaction. A couple more tight faces in the crowd reacting would have been swell. And Michael is right: Getting a couple of soundbites from the crowd would have helped.

You have lot a of natural sound, but it is covered by your subject's narrative. Weave the nat and narrative in and out. Remember: Natural sound is great storytelling too.



Rep: 444
Eric Seals Oct. 2, 2012, 8:25 a.m. permalink

I was fascinated from the start. Watching people play with fire? How can one not enjoy this? You've got the wow factor going on :-)


There is really not much that I can add to the wonderful things Michael and Colin said to make this piece better. Just apply what they said and keep it in your mind for your next video and you'll be "en fuego"

The one thing I will add and I'm sure they both agree is that it's good to see you showed restraint in keeping it short at 1:44. 
The cool factor of the fire artists doing the same thing over and over would of burned off with if it was long. 

Nice job, can't wait to see what you do next!

Eric

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