My neighbor (view this story)

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Rep: 141
Colin Mulvany April 29, 2010, 11:56 p.m. permalink

This story works for one main reason--you have a strong central character that pulls you in and never lets you go. I even like your audio interaction with old man Lester; it makes what he says more real knowing he’s your neighbor.

I've been on a rampage over one-person narratives lately, but I have to say, I wouldn’t do it any other way here.

The only technical fix I would make is maybe slow your Ken Burns effect down on some of the slides. I’ve ratcheted mine back on my own slideshows and I think it looks less distracting. You don't want to pull the viewer out of the moment with a long pan and scan movement.

The other one little detail I really wanted to see in this story was a picture of Lester and his wife when they were young. You show the one photo of them together on the wall twice.

Audio editing is smooth with no distractions. Photos are wonderful, but a couple more for variety probably would have helped fill out the edit. Nice work Mike!

Rep: 0
Steven Blewett May 3, 2010, 6:50 p.m. permalink

Loved the story. Everyone has had a neighbor like him at one time or another. Good you captured this before they pass. Nice work!

Rep: 5
Brandon Ross May 14, 2010, 10:57 a.m. permalink

works well in b&w. agree with colin about a few more photos being needed. i really like this piece.

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